Your Not-Veggie Sweetheart Still Eats Meat?

by taylorevance@gmail.com | June 20, 2016 12:05 pm

But What if Your Sweetheart Still Eats Meat? How can you come to peace with the situation?

There seem to be two camps.

The vegetarian lifestyle is one that fosters a certain “arrogance” because of their demand for real foods. It is also easy to get an “I’m better than you” attitude because vegetarian living is clearly a higher way to live from a wellness perspective and because so often our reasons for becoming a vegetarian is grounded in:

1. Moral

2. Ethical

3. Religious values

These ethics are good for them as long as they are solely functioning within the vegetarian community.[1]

Here’s where a problem comes in. Your sweetheart is a meat eater, and you don’t know what to do? What if the one you are attracted to, dating, engaged to or even married to is not a vegetarian? Or what if you’re the meat eater and your beloved is a vegetarian?

These scenarios can influence and cause some pretty touchy moments.

The vegetarian lifestyle is not about hostility. It is very peaceful and respectful. So your relationship must have some guidelines on how to survive and live in peace and harmony. Since your romantic companion has not followed you in your vegetarian way of life.

What are your options?

1. Your sweetheart is to become a vegetarian with you.

You could go with the discussion of, “well if you loved me you would stop eating meat.” But requiring someone to join the vegetarian population out of guilt is a lousy reason to make that change of life. Your beloved will just resent giving up food he or she loves and will presumably cheat on his or her promise by eating meat when not with you.

That’s no way to live because it causes resentment, tension, and deception and it is not a good plan for a long term love affair to survive.

2. A healthier way is to come to terms with your disagreements, find ways to live with each other and then see if, down the road, your sweetheart might convert of his/her own free will.

3. The first step is to talk about your differences openly without trying to push your way on him or her. As it is correct in any conflict in an intimate relationship, it pays to be kind and listen to the other person’s point of view.

• Find a good quiet place to Sit down and talk about where each of you is on this subject.
• You can Agree to disagree still being compassionate about their reasons for their decisions.
• You can also agree to find understandings and not to hold the other in shame of to challenge the other for the life choices he or she has made.
• By reaching a loving agreement, each of you cal allow the other to be who he or she is, and the fomance can continue as the dietary dispute is resolved peacefully.[2]

Together, you can look for restaurants that offer both vegetarian dishes and meat dishes so each of you can get what you want. No, you don’t have to go to a restaurant that shouts in its advertising, “We Serve Vegetarians!” All a good restaurant needs is a few good menu entries that are meatless, and you can find what you want while your sweetheart enjoys a meat dish. Most good restaurants offer a tempting salad offering that you can customize so any meat, bacon bits, boiled eggs, or even cheese, are left out. By working together to build a good list of restaurants, both of you can enjoy, you have a compromise for date nights that will last a long time.

Finding ways for both of you to enjoy your diet of choice is a good long-term setup. But your loved one may have a misconception that vegetarian food can’t taste good. So make a deal that he or she might try it one night. Then you can put your best foot forward by preparing a sumptuous vegetarian meal that nobody can resist. But be aware that if you try to make such a deal, you might have to agree to let your sweetheart try to convert you back to the meat-eating world with a sumptuous homemade meat-based meal. If that is not okay with you, don’t make the deal.

Above all, don’t mock or look upon your sweetheart’s choice of diet with disdain or disgust. Don’t make the “eww” face each time your date has a hamburger or a hot dog. Come to the point that you can live with meat-eaters and not feel repulsed when others eat the foods you don’t approve of. After all, you would not want your date to make the “eww” face when you had a tofu burger or a big plate of steaming vegetables instead of meat. So treat each other with respect and love. Over time, this approach will result in the best long-term love affair and maybe even see you come to a time when he or she sees the light and joins you in the joy of vegetarianism.

Tell me:

What would you do?

How did you solve – or not solve – this predicament?

 

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