What’s So RIGHT About You?
If you’re like most people, this is a short list…a very short list! When you learned how to conform to society’s mandates, and those of your parents and your peers, and your boss, you learned something else subconsciously. You learned how to discount all those other important factors that comprise the real you!
They are the sum total of who you are.
Those are your looks, your behaviors, your intuitions, your experiences, your heritage, your mind, your spirit, your feelings, your interests, etc. The other missing variable is what you have to offer to others and to society in general. That’s the part of you that was buried for so long during the tempests of life. They were lost along with everything else you trained yourself to overlook. You do not want the best that’s in you to be concealed in a precious urn at an archaeological dig.
Why are you hiding yourself so deeply?
The “Sit Up And Take Notice” Exercise
I have a friend by the name of Tanya. Whenever she and I go to horse shows, she remarks about the positive features and accomplishments of the various horses, and their standings in the competitions. She also points out their carriage (whatever that’s) and their performance styles. At least ten times during her discussion (lecture?), she notes a particular positive characteristic of each horse and remarks: “When you see that in a horse, you have to ‘sit up and take notice’.”
When you have time alone, review the various factors that comprise you and your personality. Do not overlook anything.
Note your positive characteristics. Now, ‘Sit up and take notice!’ Those are items you have buried deep within the dark vaults of your memory. Those are the positive characteristics you have overlooked for so many years.
This is very important, so do write down what your positive characteristics are, because you’re so accustomed at dismissing them as irrelevant. ACCEPT them! They signify very vibrant parts of you as a person. Those traits are different from those of your brothers or sisters or your friends or anyone else. Those qualities are cornerstones for the new you that’s already a work-in-progress.
There are lots of people who spend their time criticizing themselves and others. Whatever you focus your attention on grows! How would you like all the things you judge to grow bigger and more ugly? That’s a scary thought. While on the other hand all the good attributes you notice will grow and become even more beautiful.
The Power Of Self Acceptance – How To Stop Beating Yourself Up
Why Forgive yourself
If you regrets things in the past this can prevent you from fully practicing self-acceptance. Learn how to Forgive yourself, and move on. “Whether it’s about something you’ve done or a personality quirk that resulted in a social faux pas, it’s important to learn from the mistake, make efforts to grow, and accept that you can’t change the past,” Howes said.
Self acceptance is actually the easiest path to take. When the feelings of remorse resurface, remember these words, he said: “I made the best decision I could have made with information I had at the time,” as taught in NLP training. You have always made the best decisions with the experience and tools you had at hand! Lighten up and forgive yourself for everything you ever thought, said or did! Your ability for Self Acceptance will grow and you will feel better!
Congratulate yourself for lightening up your life!