Do you want to Increase Your Confidence with Making Decisions?
Nothing is more frustrating to yourself and those around you than being unable to make a decision and stick to it. People who fail to make simple decisions may suffer from a lack of self-confidence.
There can be many reasons why you lack the confidence to make decisions in your life.
- You may have grown up where your parents made all the decisions for you
- You were told not to question authorities – your parents, etc.
- Another reason may be that you do not like the pressure it puts on you, as
- You question whether you are making the right decision and
- You may be fearful how your decision will affect others.
- You may feel very anxious even at the thought of having to make a decision.
Here are a few ways to recognize if you are someone who lacks confidence in making decisions:
You would rather have someone else make the decision for you –
If you routinely pass the decision making to someone else, because you do not trust that you will do the right thing, then this demonstrates that you do not have confidence in your ability.
You never make a decision quickly –
Other people may be relying on you for a decision, but you let weeks or months slide by without ever making a decision. If you avoid making a decision, just because you do not know what to decide, then this can be an indicator that your confidence level in your abilities is very poor.
When you do make a decision, you second-guess yourself –
If you constantly worry that you have not made the right decision, you are again demonstrating a lack of confidence in your abilities.
No matter what has led up to the inability to trust yourself when making decisions, it is something that you can become better at if you work at it.
In what follows, are ideas for improving your confidence to make better decisions.
- Make an “unofficial” decision –
In other words, this is a decision that is not yet set in stone. Make a decision, and live with that decision for a day. For example, you have decided to upgrade to a bigger house, and you have the money saved up.
When you find a home that you really like that fits all the criteria you want in a bigger house, what kind of a decision will you make?
It has a big yard, a deck, and an attached garage. However, if you have trouble making decisions:
- you may find yourself trying to talk yourself out of it, as you begin to worry
- how you will afford it,
- the increased heating and cooling costs, and so forth.
- This is where it can help to make an “unofficial’ decision.
- You have to decide that you will or will not move.
- Pick one, and live with that decision for a day.
- Make your mind believe that the decision is a real one that you have made.
- Then see how your decision makes you feel.
- This can be a good way to test decisions before making them official.
- Understanding that you can still change your mind, if it does not feel right, can be comforting.
- Recognize decisions that are reversible –
For example, if you are having a tough time determining what color to paint your house, start by getting some color swatches. Then make a evaluation, rather than continuing to fret over what is the perfect color. Realize that if you start painting and do not like the color, that this is a decision that can easily be fixed by choosing another color.
- Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen –
Similar to the previous point above, you need to recognize that not all decisions are life altering. If you can begin by making small decisions such as what movie to go to, you can grow your confidence to make bigger decisions as time goes on.
- Write down pros and cons of each decision you are considering –
Sometimes it can help if you write down and see your ideas for and against a decision written down on paper in front of you. When you see (rather than just think of) the options, it can make it easier to come to a decision.
- Now it is time to make decisions a little quicker –
Practice going to different restaurants and quickly deciding on your choice of a meal to become more confident of your ability.
PS: Have you had trouble deciding big choices for your life?
How did you overcome those dilemmas?